My Testimony

I grew up in a Christian household where I always believed in Jesus, knew Him personally and loved Him. However I was not strong enough in my faith or knew enough of His word to withstand against the attacks of the enemy. Entering high school I unfortunately changed my morals to fit in. I started dating one boy when I was 16 who did not know The Lord and had no interest to. I started to follow my boyfriend's was of life. Every night I would cry and ask God to forgive me but I was not strong enough to change anything. I had fallen away from my First Love, Jesus. In the summer of 2009 at 17 years old I found out I was pregnant. My world came crashing down and I had nothing to hold onto. Abortion was out of the question and so for nine months I wrestled with the options of either parenting or an open-adoption. Those nine months I remember crying out to God every single day for Him to rescue me and show me the path for this child and myself. As I went forth with creating an adoption plan, I had such peace with this option but then the attacks of the enemy would come and I would start to doubt and negative thoughts flooded my mind. I could not break up with my boyfriend nor surrender it all to God. But God’s love is never-ending and His promises are forever that He would never leave me nor forsake me! He was the director in this story I just didn't know it at the time.

God provided the most wonderful couple who wanted to adopt my son, Joseph. When they first started looking to adopt, they had hoped not to have an open-adoption but when they first talked with me it all changed. The Lord was working! However on the day of the birth of Joseph I could not follow through with the adoption and had chosen to parent him. During the next three months I cut off all the worldly influences in my life and surrendered all to God. I was starting from ground zero letting The Lord lead. The Holy Spirit kept leading me to adoption and bringing this couple into my mind. God gave me this incredible strength!

I have a lot to be grateful for, I had a group of women who met weekly for our Bible study. We prayed, cried and they mentored me throughout my pregnancy, when I had Joseph and after the adoption. For those women I will be forever grateful.

 In Psalm 73 it says,

“My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and portion forever!”
With this strength in my heart and complete trust in The Lord, Joseph was adopted by that amazing couple, Matt and Julie. I now see him regularly and have such a close relationship with all of them and am a part of their family. God is always faithful and good. Where The Lord leads I will follow!  

Romans 8:28 "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose."

I let God take control of my life, I shattered my heart at Jesus’ feet and allowed Him to work on it, refine it and put it back together new inside of me. I was taught so much during those two years. 

Psalm 30:1-5, 8-12

"I will extol you, O Lord, for you have drawn me up

and have not let my foes rejoice over me.

O Lord my God, I cried to you for help, 

and you have healed me.

O Lord, you have brought up my soul from Sheol;

You restored me to life from among those who go down to the pit.

Sing praises to The Lord, O you His saints,

and give thanks to His holy name.

For His anger is but for a moment,

His favor is for a lifetime.

Weeping may tarry for the night,

but joy comes with the morning...

To you, O Lord, I cry,

and to The Lord I plead for mercy:

What profit is there in my death,

if I go down to the pit?

Will the dust praise you?

Will it tell of your faithfulness?

Hear, O Lord, and be merciful to me!

O Lord, be my helper!

You have turned my mourning into dancing;

You have loosed my sackcloth

and clothed me with gladness,

that my glory may sing your praise and not be silent.

I Lord my God, I will give thanks to you forever!"

I moved with my family to Massachusetts and received my Esthetics license and worked in a spa for a year. 

But during all this I had such a strong desire for so much more!

I then signed up with Youth With A Mission (YWAM) to be apart of Engage DTS (discipleship training school) in Kona Hawaii starting January 2013. It was the most life-changing and transformational six months of my life. The enemy was exposed and so many deep roots, lies and fears where finally broken off forever! I am walking in freedom. I am falling madly in love with Jesus even more than before and my knowledge and faith has grown so deep and strong!
I live now in a Biblical mindset, with a desire to become more like Jesus each day, loving Him more, obeying Him more and fighting for the freedom in others who are living in bondage!